The past is present

Watched a rather silly movie about being able to travel back in time today.

Made me wonder what I would go back to change, given the chance.

There's the obvious: I wouldn't have argued with my father the last time I saw him. And maybe I would've quit my job (which I would lose 6 months later, anyways) to help him up at Lasqueti and to try and work on my writing (like we had argued about).

I would've tried to understand him more. And my mother too. Sometimes it's hard to think of your parents as people: they're simply your parents. But if I'm this fucked up at 34, hell, they've got almost 30 years on me so they've been there and done that and got married and raised two kids in the interim. What do I know?

I wouldn't have picked on and beat up my brother as much as I did. I suppose at the time it made me feel bigger, more superior and in control. I'm just thankful that now that he is five inches taller than me he doesn't feel the need for revenge.

It's all irrelevant and I'm not one for thinking "what could have been". It is what it is and it's how you deal with it.

As it stands there are 24 hours left until, possibly, Lasqueti is no longer ours.

We were lucky to have it as long as we did. It was like an entity in my life, a part of me, of who I aspired to be. It is infinitely beautiful and boundless. I literally have a lifetime of memories.