So while I was showering yesterday I noticed that the tub faucet was coming away from the wall a bit. I tried to push it back, but it kept jutting out about a half an inch. Harried and irritated, I thought nothing more of it. Hopped into the shower this morning. It was doing that thing where it pulled away from the wall again. I was irritated. But not half as irritated as I was when the facking thing came OFF and water started jetting out of the 1/2" copper pipe in my fucking bathroom wall, hitting me at mid thigh. I stood there stupidly for a couple of seconds before turning it all off. I had to finish my shower with my left knee pressed against the tub faucet so that water would still route through the shower head.
When I left the shower I was shaking with anxiety and frustration.
See. I don't know everything. You'd think I did, but I don't. I can't fix cracked head gaskets and I don't change my own oil and sometimes it's easier to wipe my laptop clean and start from scratch than to try and figure out why it's running so slow. And, when I held the tub faucet in my hands and thought to myself "well, I'm not entirely stupid: I should be able to figure this out" and I couldn't figure it out, I became rather despondent.
And emailed Michael.
Michael who fixes everything that doesn't work in my life.
Long story short: he couldn't figure out the mechanism of my tub faucet either, so we went to Home Depot and bought one that, um, wasn't an utter piece of shit. And he installed it. And caulked it.
I learned a lot about tub faucets today. Predominately that the Delta Diverter Tub Spout should be taken out back and shot. The Moen whatever the hell it is, however, is really good. I mean, this facking Delta thing just slid onto the copper pipe and had this little pin that was supposed to withhold the force of the water jetting against it as it was rerouted to the shower head. The Moen had some plastic bits 
with threading and a bolt to tighten it on to the copper pipe and, though I'm just a stupid girl, made a shitload more sense than simply sliding something onto a piece of slick pipe and hoping for the best.
with threading and a bolt to tighten it on to the copper pipe and, though I'm just a stupid girl, made a shitload more sense than simply sliding something onto a piece of slick pipe and hoping for the best.Long story short? I get to have a shower tomorrow morning without having to use my knees for leverage. It really doesn't take much to make me happy.
What would I do without Michael? He's sooooo patient with me. He missed tonight's clinic to put up with me in a snarky tizzy to replace my tub faucet. To repay him we went to a local pub, which we both knew was rough and tumble, but it was exceptionally so tonight (karaoke) and so we spent an hour screaming at each other and trying to make small talk over the wailing of less than stellar crooners who had had too many Miller Genuine Drafts and thought that their vocal range was improving the louder they sang.
I'm such a spazz.
3 comments:
This kind of stuff happens on boats every other ten minutes. This is why it's best to just live on barstools.
Happens in old houses too. I noticed water dripping from the back end of the faucet when I used the 'kids' tub a few nights ago. That faucet is probably a Delta. This is when the hubby wishes we lived in a rented apartment... just call the Super.
Ah. I couldn't have a boat. Well, maybe if I had all the time and money in the world.
Who am I kidding? I can barely manage a toaster.
And yes, sometimes I do long for the days of the rented apartments! But then once I had water coming out of a light fixture in my kitchen. That was a fun night.
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