I was reading Dan Savage's column while on the toilet today (the one that starts "I'm a straight guy in my late twenties") and, while I think Jesper Parnevik is a huge douche bag for his disparaging comments about Woods (and to think that I used to consider his pants cool), I further think Savage is bang on when he writes:I suppose I’m obligated to say a few words about Tiger Woods. First, let’s pretend that Elin Nordegren cheated on Tiger and that Tiger went after Elin with a golf club. Would Elin be viewed as the sole transgressor in the marriage then? Probably not. And second, daily papers and cable-news outfits reacted to Tiger’s “transgressions” by changing the names in the same “Why do powerful men cheat?” stories they’ve been pimping since Bill Clinton blew a load on a White House intern. For the millionth time: men cheat for the same reasons women cheat, i.e., because they’re bored or horny or unfulfilled or desperate to see someone else naked for a change. People cheat because monogamy isn’t natural and we are wired to cheat. That doesn’t make cheating right, of course; people should honour their commitments, and blah-de-nine-iron-blah. But we shouldn’t encourage people to make commitments we all know they’re unlikely to keep.Yay!
The end.
But that's not why I'm here today. Actually, I'm not sure why I am here at all.
At any rate, had a wonderful evening at Coco's last night with the wine and the gingerbread cookie making and cheese puffs and chorizo sausage and scallops and great music, conversation and good vibes. I'm glad I was able to see Squishy and Skyhammer and Po and Coco and Michael (are we calling him Mandolin Michael, then?), and that my very own Michael (Michael 26.2?) came along as well. I wish we could do that every Friday. I love cheese very much.
I'm off in a little while for another soiree in Burnaby after which I believe I will redeem my birthday dinner at Hachi Hana and then hopefully watch "Margot at the Wedding" with Michael unless I fall asleep the minute I get home like what I did last night.
And I will start running again tomorrow. A week off is good and my knees are starting to ache and I'm getting cranky and mildly depressed.
9 comments:
I'm not wired to cheat. Not everybody is. When I'm in love, the thought of cheating makes me sick. It really does. If the relationship isn't working, get out. Don't cheat.
p.s I bought a book from the library today on how to write properlike, you know, with correct punctuation.
I used to write really well before I moved to Japan Land and started thinking in another language for nearly 2 decades and teaching really slow and easy English tout les temps.
Have to relearn the whole damn thing now.
p.p.s I'm a polygamist's worst nightmare. LOL!
On beginning anew. Okay. If you are resuming running again tomorrow than so am I.
I think if you're not wired to cheat then you should be with someone who is also not wired to cheat. Then they'll never be any misunderstandings.
I also think (and this stat is from your blog) that at least 30% of the population is cheating/has cheated and it's not because they don't love their partner or because the relationship isn't working, it's because it's human nature.
Blah. I could go on but I have some spicy tuna and salmon rolls that need to be in my stomach because I haven't eaten since breakfast and I'm having a hypoglycemic fit.
Coco: good on you! I've been binge eating and drinking for a week and it's time to get back to reality. One can only eat so much Hagen Daaz. And believe me, I ate A LOT.
Thanks again for having us last night: it was super tasty and lots of fun!
I think people cheat out of boredom, lust, a nagging (abusive) partner, absence of sex... lots of reasons. Ask a cheater, they will come up with the excuse that fits to justify why they did it.
Hubby and I made a vow to always treat each other the way we wanted to be treated. So when he's hungry he makes enough food for me too. It's nice that he quit drinking 28 years ago, more for me.... tee hee.
"First, let’s pretend that Elin Nordegren cheated on Tiger and that Tiger went after Elin with a golf club."
Come on, Tiger wouldn't miss with a golf club would he?
I think if you're seeing a man called "Tiger Woods" you gonna be expectin' somethin' know what I mean?
Oi Cod, I remember on your blog wayyyy back there was a pic of some innocent looking bobbed blonde and you said you shagged her bloke and so she doesn't talk to you anymore?
...or am I imagining things?
I do forget the detail...
There is no such thing as cheating. The human animal isn't meant to be monogamous. You may not want to hear this or believe this ladies but, your fathers cheated. Your boyfriends and husbands did/will too. Each and every one of them. If they didn't, it was because they lacked the opportunity. We are wired with sexual conquest in our DNA. It's not just the desire to pass on the seed. Most of us are also wired to love/desire other women. We need to feel wanted in the same way that women do. We may not have that "forever" thing built in but being loved and desired is paramount.
Now, you're asking yourself if I've ever been with another woman after being married for 23 years. The answer is no. That's another wiring thing that we have. No, I have not. The woman that you think you just saw me naked in bed with is a figment of your imagination. That was not me and that was not what you think it was, if it was me. Are you going to believe me, or your lying eyes? Okay, it was me having sex with her - but it was only sex. I had sex with her but I "make love" to you. She was an urge - you are my soulmate.
Wiring.
Uhh G, can we talk to your wife a minute?
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